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So I am Single. I have been dating since high school and have had a few boyfriends but nothing healthy or long lasting. I have had my heartbroken and honestly, can't remember breaking any myself. I have met so many men from different backgrounds and different cultures.
I rarely have a boyfriend long enough for my friends and family to meet them. Every so often someone gets a glimpse of one of my dates, and this is the only proof that some of them actually exist.
So I have had my heart broken, been dumped, rejected, denied and fired....and I still feel on top of this beautiful, exciting and promising world. I feel this way because I know that the man of my dreams is out there. I just know it! I am thankful that these men have moved on briskly because if the losers stick around, I wont be available when Mr Right gets here. So I have changed what getting dumped means to me and crazily enough, after shedding a tear or two, especially for the ones I thought id marry, I get excited!
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand just because we are ladies in waiting, it does not mean that we cant have a little fun now does it? Of course not! So let me give you a some tips on how to do that ;-)
Tip #1 Fake it till you make it!
People believe what they see. Men are attracted to modest confidence, womanliness and the biggest most important one of all....Mystery! They love it!! So if you are not already one of those girls....start there! The real lessons will come later!
Tip #2 Don't have to be rich to wear hot clothes?
If you haven't already noticed....the whole entire fashion world is based on peoples ideas on what is cool and wearable. The people that start these trends are people like you and me. So whats stopping us from using our creativity? Nothing! I like beautiful new season clothes from Portmans and Principles but the truth is...I cant afford it all the time! So I improvise. I find and outfit that suits my figure perfectly and duplicate it in heaps of different colors and accessories. Your sure to always look good. Don't forget to watch a little MTV or E Channel to get the latest scoop in fashion too!
Tip #3 Less Is More
Easy on the War Paint! I love make up...adore it! Would be lost without it. However, I have seen sooooooooooooo many girls out there who pile on the make up. There is a huge difference between day wear, evening wear and dress ups. Day wear you want to have something very natural. Foundation (maybe some powder or bronzer), a little eye brow pencil, mascara that lengthens and frames your eyes and your favorite gloss is all you need. Ensure you blend that foundation in.....theres nothing worse then a mask line between your face and neck.
Evening, the same but add shimmer on your check bones and maybe a little more mascara and a darker shade of gloss.
Dressups - (maybe out to night clubs) Go for it! Anything goes really.....depends on who you are wanting to impress. Check out whats the latest on E Channel, MTV and Mags for tips. Bonus Tip: Guys like a natural looking girl. When there is too much make up they cant help but wonder what is going on under it!!!
Tip #4 Attitude is everything...
If your having a rough time loving who you are then obviously you have had either a broken heart, someones hurt you, someones made you feel inadequate or you watch to much t.v. We may not all look like models but who freakin does? There are things about my body I hate....heaps of them....but guess what. Certain Bras make my boobs look great and Baby Doll dress and tops hide my tummy and dresses and skirts hide my pudgy legs. So when looking in the mirror after I have worked my magic....I think nothing but.... fabulous! Find what you love about you and accentuate it! You need to believe you are worth being loved and you need to believe you are super hot!! If you believe it, they will believe it!
Tip #5 Smile...
People are attracted to positivity. Don't believe me??? Try it. Not once and awhile. All the time.....see what starts to happen when you smile. The boys boys wonder what the mystery behind that cute smile is all about.
Tip #6 Smell Good...
Have a couple of delicious perfumes that people will remember you by. Day and Evening fragrances. Don't load it on, just enough so that when someone walks by they catch a hint of your mesmerising scent.
Tip #7 Don't be too eager...
When you are approached by a man and he does ask you out, which he will. Whether it be randomly, over the net or set up by a friend (I meet most of my men over the net). Don't put everything off for him immediately and say YES YES YES! Be calm, think about the date and say "that sounds really nice, can I just check on a few things and get back to you"? Then grab his no. and the next day call him and politely make a time that suits you both. Your a lady after all.
Tip #8 Finally...
Be yourself....how is someone supposed to like you if your not even being you. Be calm, cool and collected. It is normal for us women to have a man half way down the isle on the first date.....but don't bloody tell him that! LOL Joke a bit, smile, be polite and don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. Just because he finds you hot doesn't mean you have to feel the same....and never ever sleep with a man on the first date.....ever!
Have fun :-)
About the Author
Hi There :-) I am really enjoying my journey through out the internet and am delighted with what resources I have found in order to better myself financially and academically. I am excited about what the future holds for me and am relieved that I have finally found my niche. Which is learning and becoming successful in something I love.
http://bitofacutie.blogspot.com/ or http://www.squidoo.com/choosingonlinebusinesses
Friday, July 25, 2008
The Evolution of the Golf Ball
The Wooden Ball
When golf first came about, the balls used were made from hardwoods such as beech and crudely rounded with tools. This period lasted from the 14th Century to the 17th Century.
In the late 16th Century it is recorded that one William Mayne was producing clubs for the nobility in Scotland. In 1603 Mayne, a bowmaker by trade was appointed, among other things, clubmaker to King James VI of Scotland, shortly before his accession to the throne of England.
Record books also show that in 1447 King James II issued his now famous edict in Parliament that golf was to be outlawed. His concern was that his subjects were more interested in golf than training how to use the warfare weapons of their time! Worried this would leave his country defenceless; he banned golf (although it was still played, just not by the masses.)
The Feather Ball
The feather ball period was the longest period of stability in the history of the golf ball. The feathery ball period lasted from as early as the 14th Century to as late as the 16th Century and was produced until the early 1850's. In its beginnings the leather golf balls were likely to have been filled with wool or hair.
These balls quickly lost their resilience and ultimately it was discovered that the use of feathers produced a livelier and longer lasting ball.
Producing a feathery was a time consuming process that required considerable expertise. The craftsmen themselves vied with each other for the contracts from the richest patrons of the game and were often scathing about the results their competitors achieved.
Enough feathers went into each ball to fill a Top Hat and contrary to the name of this ball it was as hard as a stone and could travel in excess of 250yds.
Feather golf balls were not round and were more often than not oblong in shape. There were a variety of sizes and weights and the ball would be marked with its weight in drams clearly visible along with the maker's name. Despite not being round feathery golf balls did fly and roll with remarkable trueness and were perfectly suited to the crude greens of the day.
The Gutty Ball
This is where the modern era started, with the feathery being replaced by the gutty.
The industrial revolution was booming in the UK and factories started to manufacture many more products using rubber...it was only a matter of time before someone would substitute the feathery with a more durable material.
In the end Reverend James Patterson, a keen golfer discovered the gutty-percha whilst on missionary work in Malaysia. Gutty-percha is a similar material to rubber that is made from the dried sap of a tree and James discovered almost by mistake that this material could be used to make golf balls with.
Two-piece metal mouldings were made to produce perfectly round spheres. At first only smooth balls were manufactured but golfers soon began to realise that the more the ball nicked and marked, the easier it was to predict their shots. This eventually led to manufacturers producing gutty balls with surface markings to enhance their aerodynamic qualities.
Quickly these balls were being made at a fraction of the cost of the feathery and eventually the game of golf became affordable to the general public.
The Bramble
The balls were known as brambles as the balls resembled the fruit found on brambles with a raised dimple pattern on the golf ball. Originally bramble balls were entirely made of gutty-percha and covered with a bramble pattern cover. This ball soon overtook the gutty as the preferred choice of the then pro golfers and heralded the beginning of the dimpled ball as we know it today.
The Mesh
During the beginning of the twentieth century, there was a boom in golf ball manufacturers around the country, each experimenting with rubber core mesh balls. It was this period that the modern day golf ball as we now it know came about. Early dimple balls created during the early 1900's were proving to offer players greater spin and feel and an Englishman called William Taylor patented the dimple method in 1905.
Spalding USA immediately purchased the rights for this patent and began to manufacturer dimple balls as early as 1909.
Until the patent expired in the 1920's every company attempted to obtain an advantage over their competitors by designing unique mesh type patterns on golf balls. There was the Rifled Ball - designed like the barrel of a gun - which according to adverts would fly like a bullet. It did, but only if you hit it 100% straight - otherwise it was off - spinning everywhere.
There were raised banana shapes, donut dimples, Stars, Circles, and Hexagons you name it they tried it!
One by one these balls eventually were superseded by another new pattern, and so on, until eventually the square mesh ball became standard. More and more of the small golf ball manufacturers were squeezed out of the market by the larger corporations such as Spalding, Dunlop, Slazenger, Wilson etc, and by the end of the 40's the market was dominated by the same leading golf manufacturers as today's market, with the exception of a Scottish firm called St Mungo who in 1935 dominated the UK market, along with Spalding.
With the development of golf balls progressing at an alarming rate the U.S.G.A, fearful of the skill level required to play golf being continually compromised by the golf ball manufacturers, decided to standardize the weight and size of golf balls. In 1931 the U.S.G.A ruled that no ball played in their championships could weigh more than 1.55 oz, or was smaller than 1.68" in diameter. These new sizes were not popular with the British golfers, as the windswept links of yesteryear required different flight characteristics from a ball.
In January 1932 the Royal & Ancient Golf Association and the U.S.G.A reached a partial compromise on weight and size with the maximum weight being 1.62 oz and a minimum of 1.62" in diameter. The U.S.G.A accepted the new weight but maintained 1.68" as the diameter.
With technology constantly improving the driving distance of new balls, the U.S.G.A developed a machine to test the velocity of golf balls in 1941 and in 1942 set the velocity limit at 250 feet. Eventually by 1940 more or less all balls manufactured were the dimple style and the manufacturers turned their research to improving the golf ball within the rules of the game.
With the exception of the one-piece rubber balls, which were introduced in the 1960's -this was the last major period of change in golf balls until today's multi-layer golf balls were introduced.
Ian (author) writes for Mailordergolf.com who sell cheap golf balls, golf clubs and other golfing equipment.
-MFA Corp@sport
When golf first came about, the balls used were made from hardwoods such as beech and crudely rounded with tools. This period lasted from the 14th Century to the 17th Century.
In the late 16th Century it is recorded that one William Mayne was producing clubs for the nobility in Scotland. In 1603 Mayne, a bowmaker by trade was appointed, among other things, clubmaker to King James VI of Scotland, shortly before his accession to the throne of England.
Record books also show that in 1447 King James II issued his now famous edict in Parliament that golf was to be outlawed. His concern was that his subjects were more interested in golf than training how to use the warfare weapons of their time! Worried this would leave his country defenceless; he banned golf (although it was still played, just not by the masses.)
The Feather Ball
The feather ball period was the longest period of stability in the history of the golf ball. The feathery ball period lasted from as early as the 14th Century to as late as the 16th Century and was produced until the early 1850's. In its beginnings the leather golf balls were likely to have been filled with wool or hair.
These balls quickly lost their resilience and ultimately it was discovered that the use of feathers produced a livelier and longer lasting ball.
Producing a feathery was a time consuming process that required considerable expertise. The craftsmen themselves vied with each other for the contracts from the richest patrons of the game and were often scathing about the results their competitors achieved.
Enough feathers went into each ball to fill a Top Hat and contrary to the name of this ball it was as hard as a stone and could travel in excess of 250yds.
Feather golf balls were not round and were more often than not oblong in shape. There were a variety of sizes and weights and the ball would be marked with its weight in drams clearly visible along with the maker's name. Despite not being round feathery golf balls did fly and roll with remarkable trueness and were perfectly suited to the crude greens of the day.
The Gutty Ball
This is where the modern era started, with the feathery being replaced by the gutty.
The industrial revolution was booming in the UK and factories started to manufacture many more products using rubber...it was only a matter of time before someone would substitute the feathery with a more durable material.
In the end Reverend James Patterson, a keen golfer discovered the gutty-percha whilst on missionary work in Malaysia. Gutty-percha is a similar material to rubber that is made from the dried sap of a tree and James discovered almost by mistake that this material could be used to make golf balls with.
Two-piece metal mouldings were made to produce perfectly round spheres. At first only smooth balls were manufactured but golfers soon began to realise that the more the ball nicked and marked, the easier it was to predict their shots. This eventually led to manufacturers producing gutty balls with surface markings to enhance their aerodynamic qualities.
Quickly these balls were being made at a fraction of the cost of the feathery and eventually the game of golf became affordable to the general public.
The Bramble
The balls were known as brambles as the balls resembled the fruit found on brambles with a raised dimple pattern on the golf ball. Originally bramble balls were entirely made of gutty-percha and covered with a bramble pattern cover. This ball soon overtook the gutty as the preferred choice of the then pro golfers and heralded the beginning of the dimpled ball as we know it today.
The Mesh
During the beginning of the twentieth century, there was a boom in golf ball manufacturers around the country, each experimenting with rubber core mesh balls. It was this period that the modern day golf ball as we now it know came about. Early dimple balls created during the early 1900's were proving to offer players greater spin and feel and an Englishman called William Taylor patented the dimple method in 1905.
Spalding USA immediately purchased the rights for this patent and began to manufacturer dimple balls as early as 1909.
Until the patent expired in the 1920's every company attempted to obtain an advantage over their competitors by designing unique mesh type patterns on golf balls. There was the Rifled Ball - designed like the barrel of a gun - which according to adverts would fly like a bullet. It did, but only if you hit it 100% straight - otherwise it was off - spinning everywhere.
There were raised banana shapes, donut dimples, Stars, Circles, and Hexagons you name it they tried it!
One by one these balls eventually were superseded by another new pattern, and so on, until eventually the square mesh ball became standard. More and more of the small golf ball manufacturers were squeezed out of the market by the larger corporations such as Spalding, Dunlop, Slazenger, Wilson etc, and by the end of the 40's the market was dominated by the same leading golf manufacturers as today's market, with the exception of a Scottish firm called St Mungo who in 1935 dominated the UK market, along with Spalding.
With the development of golf balls progressing at an alarming rate the U.S.G.A, fearful of the skill level required to play golf being continually compromised by the golf ball manufacturers, decided to standardize the weight and size of golf balls. In 1931 the U.S.G.A ruled that no ball played in their championships could weigh more than 1.55 oz, or was smaller than 1.68" in diameter. These new sizes were not popular with the British golfers, as the windswept links of yesteryear required different flight characteristics from a ball.
In January 1932 the Royal & Ancient Golf Association and the U.S.G.A reached a partial compromise on weight and size with the maximum weight being 1.62 oz and a minimum of 1.62" in diameter. The U.S.G.A accepted the new weight but maintained 1.68" as the diameter.
With technology constantly improving the driving distance of new balls, the U.S.G.A developed a machine to test the velocity of golf balls in 1941 and in 1942 set the velocity limit at 250 feet. Eventually by 1940 more or less all balls manufactured were the dimple style and the manufacturers turned their research to improving the golf ball within the rules of the game.
With the exception of the one-piece rubber balls, which were introduced in the 1960's -this was the last major period of change in golf balls until today's multi-layer golf balls were introduced.
Ian (author) writes for Mailordergolf.com who sell cheap golf balls, golf clubs and other golfing equipment.
-MFA Corp@sport
Varities of Healthy And Easy To Cook Trout Recipe
Trouts are fresh water fishes and commercially farmed for sports fishing and human consumption.
We've eaten trout for hundreds of years now and trout can be cooked in plenty of ways. Let me share with you some good trout recipes and different simple ways how to cook trout. Hope you enjoy cooking them!
ESCALLOPED TROUT
Boil two trout in salted water, drain and flake, removing all the bones. Fry a small chopped onion in butter, add a tablespoonful of flour and two cupfuls of milk. Cook until thick, stirring constantly. Put a layer of the boned fish in a buttered baking-pan, add a layer of the sauce, sprinkle with minced parsley, and repeat until the dish is full. Cover with crumbs, dot with butter, and brown in the oven.
TENDERLOIN OF TROUT WITH WINE SAUCE
Cut a large sea-trout in pieces and simmer until done in salted and acidulated boiling water to which a large sliced onion has been added. Drain and keep warm. Cook together two tablespoonfuls each of butter and flour and add enough of the liquid drained from the fish to make a thick sauce. Cook until thick, stirring constantly,take from the fire, add one cupful of Madeira wine and three eggs well-beaten. Put the fish in a buttered baking-pan, sprinkle with seasoned crumbs, cover with mushrooms, then with oysters and shrimps. Pour the sauce over and bake until the oysters are done. Serve in the dish in which it was baked.
TROUT WITH FINE HERBS
Put half a dozen cleaned trout in a buttered baking-dish with half a glassful of white wine, and a finely chopped shallot. Bake for ten minutes, strain the liquid, and add to it one cupful of Allemande Sauce. Add also a small chopped onion, two shallots, twice the quantity of mushrooms, and a bean of garlic, all minced and fried in butter. Season with salt, pepper, minced parsley, and lemon-juice; pour over the fish and serve.
BROOK-TROUT IN PAPER CASES
Stuff the fish with seasoned crumbs or chopped oysters or raw fish pounded to a pulp and mixed to a paste with the beaten white of egg and a little cream. Lay a very thin slice of salt pork on each fish and wrap in buttered paper. Bake in a hot oven. Remove the string and serve in the paper. Serve any preferred sauce separately.
For more great tasting and easy to prepare trout recipes and simple ways how to cook trout, please check out our How To Cook Fish - Great Recipes for Fish You Need blog plus lots of recipes for fish that you will love and enjoy. In case you're a salmon lover too, you'll definitely love our great collections of recipes for salmon at How to Cook Salmon blog.
Anselmo Mendez (author) is a fish and seafoods lover. He's inviting you to visit his blogs located above this article for more great collections of fish recipes.
We've eaten trout for hundreds of years now and trout can be cooked in plenty of ways. Let me share with you some good trout recipes and different simple ways how to cook trout. Hope you enjoy cooking them!
ESCALLOPED TROUT
Boil two trout in salted water, drain and flake, removing all the bones. Fry a small chopped onion in butter, add a tablespoonful of flour and two cupfuls of milk. Cook until thick, stirring constantly. Put a layer of the boned fish in a buttered baking-pan, add a layer of the sauce, sprinkle with minced parsley, and repeat until the dish is full. Cover with crumbs, dot with butter, and brown in the oven.
TENDERLOIN OF TROUT WITH WINE SAUCE
Cut a large sea-trout in pieces and simmer until done in salted and acidulated boiling water to which a large sliced onion has been added. Drain and keep warm. Cook together two tablespoonfuls each of butter and flour and add enough of the liquid drained from the fish to make a thick sauce. Cook until thick, stirring constantly,take from the fire, add one cupful of Madeira wine and three eggs well-beaten. Put the fish in a buttered baking-pan, sprinkle with seasoned crumbs, cover with mushrooms, then with oysters and shrimps. Pour the sauce over and bake until the oysters are done. Serve in the dish in which it was baked.
TROUT WITH FINE HERBS
Put half a dozen cleaned trout in a buttered baking-dish with half a glassful of white wine, and a finely chopped shallot. Bake for ten minutes, strain the liquid, and add to it one cupful of Allemande Sauce. Add also a small chopped onion, two shallots, twice the quantity of mushrooms, and a bean of garlic, all minced and fried in butter. Season with salt, pepper, minced parsley, and lemon-juice; pour over the fish and serve.
BROOK-TROUT IN PAPER CASES
Stuff the fish with seasoned crumbs or chopped oysters or raw fish pounded to a pulp and mixed to a paste with the beaten white of egg and a little cream. Lay a very thin slice of salt pork on each fish and wrap in buttered paper. Bake in a hot oven. Remove the string and serve in the paper. Serve any preferred sauce separately.
For more great tasting and easy to prepare trout recipes and simple ways how to cook trout, please check out our How To Cook Fish - Great Recipes for Fish You Need blog plus lots of recipes for fish that you will love and enjoy. In case you're a salmon lover too, you'll definitely love our great collections of recipes for salmon at How to Cook Salmon blog.
Anselmo Mendez (author) is a fish and seafoods lover. He's inviting you to visit his blogs located above this article for more great collections of fish recipes.
Run Your Car On Water Scam - The Truth Be Told
What are the facts lying beneath the run your car on water scam? Haven't you heard that if something sounded too good to be true it probably was? Gasoline and water do not mix. Don't you think if vehicle makers could do this, wouldn't they? Now you can see the truth behind the myth of the run your car on water scam.
Here are the cold truths. One, mix till your heart is tired, water will never mix with gasoline. Two, car makers have not used the technology because there is nothing in it for them. Three, all this being said, I hate to inform you that the run your car on water scam, is not a scam. This is not just a possibility in the future, it is being accomplished by thousands of people all over the globe.
Let us go in order. Water and gas do not mix. This is fact, however your car does not burn gasoline in a liquid state. It is vaporized and the fumes are what explodes. When you mix hydrogen gas with gasoline fumes it burns hotter and cleaner and more efficiently than gas and air.
Why haven't car makers used this technology? The answer may be simple greed. Every vehicle manufacturer patents the exact way their engines work. This technology was registered as public domain over 90 years ago. So, car makers cannot patent it or include it in a patented device. The bottom line is they cannot profit from it so they refuse to utilize the technology available to them. They prefer we use engines that waste 75% of the gasoline they use, namely the ones they can patent.
I have read the reviews from physicists and mathematicians that state anything that shows you how to run your car on water is a scam. They proclaim this from the mountain tops because these devices use more energy than they create. They are right, but it doesn't matter, it uses energy that is being wasted.
You see these devices create hydrogen from electricity that is not being used by your car. You car has multiple systems like this. One such system is your radiator. Almost all of the air that goes past it is not used to cool your engine. It uses the cooling capacity of less than 1% of the air. It still lowers the operating temperature of your motor, regardless of how inefficient it may be. The run your car on water scam uses electricity and heat that is wasted from your cars electrical system.
If only the naysayers would turn their energy to actually trying the product than stating it cannot be done. Remember it was readily accepted that no human could run a mile in under four minutes. They were mistaken. It was considered common knowledge that anyone who went mach 1 would die. Again, they were sorely mistaken.
I will reveal one issue no one will tell you about the run your car on water scam. Over 15,000 instructional ebooks have been sold with a no questions asked 60 day money back guarantee in over 50 different countries. Do you know what the return rate is for the most popular product (also the most expensive at $97)run your car on water scam? LESS than one percent. So are the 99% wrong or did the other 1% just not want to be bothered? You can find instructions for under $50 but a much larger percentage of these get refunded. They contain inferior information and instructions. Sometimes it is better to pay a little more and get what you want, than pay a little less and make a mistake.
To purchase the number 1 selling information product on the web CLICK HERE!
To find out more on How to Run Your Car On Water click here.
Visit my site and claim your free report "62 Ways to Beat the Gas Pump Monster" at http://water4gas.getoffgrid.com/
-MFA Corp@science
Here are the cold truths. One, mix till your heart is tired, water will never mix with gasoline. Two, car makers have not used the technology because there is nothing in it for them. Three, all this being said, I hate to inform you that the run your car on water scam, is not a scam. This is not just a possibility in the future, it is being accomplished by thousands of people all over the globe.
Let us go in order. Water and gas do not mix. This is fact, however your car does not burn gasoline in a liquid state. It is vaporized and the fumes are what explodes. When you mix hydrogen gas with gasoline fumes it burns hotter and cleaner and more efficiently than gas and air.
Why haven't car makers used this technology? The answer may be simple greed. Every vehicle manufacturer patents the exact way their engines work. This technology was registered as public domain over 90 years ago. So, car makers cannot patent it or include it in a patented device. The bottom line is they cannot profit from it so they refuse to utilize the technology available to them. They prefer we use engines that waste 75% of the gasoline they use, namely the ones they can patent.
I have read the reviews from physicists and mathematicians that state anything that shows you how to run your car on water is a scam. They proclaim this from the mountain tops because these devices use more energy than they create. They are right, but it doesn't matter, it uses energy that is being wasted.
You see these devices create hydrogen from electricity that is not being used by your car. You car has multiple systems like this. One such system is your radiator. Almost all of the air that goes past it is not used to cool your engine. It uses the cooling capacity of less than 1% of the air. It still lowers the operating temperature of your motor, regardless of how inefficient it may be. The run your car on water scam uses electricity and heat that is wasted from your cars electrical system.
If only the naysayers would turn their energy to actually trying the product than stating it cannot be done. Remember it was readily accepted that no human could run a mile in under four minutes. They were mistaken. It was considered common knowledge that anyone who went mach 1 would die. Again, they were sorely mistaken.
I will reveal one issue no one will tell you about the run your car on water scam. Over 15,000 instructional ebooks have been sold with a no questions asked 60 day money back guarantee in over 50 different countries. Do you know what the return rate is for the most popular product (also the most expensive at $97)run your car on water scam? LESS than one percent. So are the 99% wrong or did the other 1% just not want to be bothered? You can find instructions for under $50 but a much larger percentage of these get refunded. They contain inferior information and instructions. Sometimes it is better to pay a little more and get what you want, than pay a little less and make a mistake.
To purchase the number 1 selling information product on the web CLICK HERE!
To find out more on How to Run Your Car On Water click here.
Visit my site and claim your free report "62 Ways to Beat the Gas Pump Monster" at http://water4gas.getoffgrid.com/
-MFA Corp@science
Does the Truth Help or Hurt Relationships?
Remember how your relationship was in the very beginning?
You stayed up all night talking about everything - your dreams and desires and even the things that scare or embarrass you. But then, as the relationship went a long, you stopped talking about so much. Everything became so heavy and meaningful.
In the beginning, things were great. There was a level of trust and open communication that created intimacy and understanding. So, what happened to that? Where did it go and how can you get it back?
I used to try to protect my partner from those heavy, bad moods and ugly thoughts. I went to my room and hung out until I felt like socializing again.
I thought I was noble in my ability to control what came out of my mouth.
I thought I was kind because I never let on what I was thinking.
But what I was doing was ruining my relationships. There was no relationship. I was cutting myself off from others and never allowing them to know me. They never knew what I was thinking or feeling or needing.
I was an island. A very lonely island.
I really thought that if I let people know the ugly thoughts, not only would they be hurt - but they would probably become angry and disown me - betray me, talk shit behind my back. I would be the outcast.
So I beat them to the punch! Hah! I'd banish myself to my own room (or apartment, as I got older). I'd banish myself to silence.
You can either have a N.I.C.E. (Not Interested in Connecting Emotionally) relationship... where you hide what is true out of fear. Or you can have an alive, real relationship with intimacy, compassion and understanding.
Some people withhold from their partner and add an extra zinger -- they put on a show of pain and discomfort in order to punish them. It's an effort to communicate just how much pain they're in. But none of it's verbalized. It's a show of the pain.
When you start keeping secrets and withholding,.. when you cut off the sharing of life force between you,... you're cutting off the intimacy in your relationship. Even if you think you're protecting your partner from painful or embarrassing thoughts - it's still destroying your relationship.
Relationships require sharing... both our dreams and desires along with our doubts and fears.
What are you feeling and what needs of yours are being met or not? ...
I'm happy because my need for support in keeping our home is being met.
I'm disappointed because my need for partnership isn't being met in the way we're handling our finances.
I'm sad because my need for connection isn't being met when you're out with your friends every evening.
You can find out more about this style of intimate communication, along with other advice on building healthy, intimate relationships, at our website: www MagicRelationship dot com.
Another tip: when you offer your feelings and needs, it's best to follow them with a request. If you offer them without a request, your partner won't know why you're giving them the information.
Do you want to be just heard?
Do you want advice?
Do you want to come up with a strategy for meeting your needs? Why the heck are you telling me this?
Often, a comment without a request will be taken as blame... which will lead to fixing, fighting or fleeing. Don't leave your poor partner hanging.
Paul and I recommend asking, "Would you tell me what you heard me say?" (Avoid saying 'could'- it implies they aren't intelligent enough to repeat you. And avoid saying "What did I say?" because what you said and what they heard are two different things.)
And one more tip: don't think that little behaviors are enough to be warranted as 'sharing feelings and needs.' Fixing your honey a cup of coffee in the morning is very sweet, but it may not communicate your feelings of love and contentment like actually verbalizing the information. "I love you so much", PLUS the cup of coffee goes much further.
Frowning and throwing around the bed covers while you make the bed may not adequately communicate your feelings and needs, either.
Instead, say: "I'm feeling disappointed because my need for support around the house isn't being met. Would you be willing to discuss a way to help that would also meet your needs?"
There's no room for misinterpretation there.
Try it out this holiday season: make a pact with your beloved to share absolutely ALL your feelings and needs for one day - the good, the bad and the ugly. Then follow the information with a request.
Be prepared to spend some time processing and discussing those feelings and needs as they come up.
However, try to avoid getting into BLAMING and 'FAULT' behind the feelings and needs. That tends to end up in a free-for-all about evaluations and judgments - who's right and who's wrong. Try to stick with feelings, needs and requests.
Try to do this on a day when you'll have the time.
You won't want to get cut off because you have to run to pick up the kids right when you're getting to the heart of an issue that's snuck up silently between you.
You're going to want to stay and hold each other and talk it through... and feel the intimacy of clearing out all of those old, crusty feelings and unmet needs that have been clogging the flow of love.
And, again, you can find out more about this style of intimate communication for relationships, at our website - www MagicRelationship dot com - a along with advice on building healthy relationships.
Kristin Denton & Paul Sterling (authors) teach Relationship Communication Skills - Live Seminars or Tele-Classes including - 4 Steps To Instant Intimacy & Understanding - Relationship-Wrecking Mistakes -To get a free copy of 'The 5 Mistakes Report' go to http://www.magicRelationship.com/freeaccess Free Report
-MFA Corp@relationship
You stayed up all night talking about everything - your dreams and desires and even the things that scare or embarrass you. But then, as the relationship went a long, you stopped talking about so much. Everything became so heavy and meaningful.
In the beginning, things were great. There was a level of trust and open communication that created intimacy and understanding. So, what happened to that? Where did it go and how can you get it back?
I used to try to protect my partner from those heavy, bad moods and ugly thoughts. I went to my room and hung out until I felt like socializing again.
I thought I was noble in my ability to control what came out of my mouth.
I thought I was kind because I never let on what I was thinking.
But what I was doing was ruining my relationships. There was no relationship. I was cutting myself off from others and never allowing them to know me. They never knew what I was thinking or feeling or needing.
I was an island. A very lonely island.
I really thought that if I let people know the ugly thoughts, not only would they be hurt - but they would probably become angry and disown me - betray me, talk shit behind my back. I would be the outcast.
So I beat them to the punch! Hah! I'd banish myself to my own room (or apartment, as I got older). I'd banish myself to silence.
You can either have a N.I.C.E. (Not Interested in Connecting Emotionally) relationship... where you hide what is true out of fear. Or you can have an alive, real relationship with intimacy, compassion and understanding.
Some people withhold from their partner and add an extra zinger -- they put on a show of pain and discomfort in order to punish them. It's an effort to communicate just how much pain they're in. But none of it's verbalized. It's a show of the pain.
When you start keeping secrets and withholding,.. when you cut off the sharing of life force between you,... you're cutting off the intimacy in your relationship. Even if you think you're protecting your partner from painful or embarrassing thoughts - it's still destroying your relationship.
Relationships require sharing... both our dreams and desires along with our doubts and fears.
What are you feeling and what needs of yours are being met or not? ...
I'm happy because my need for support in keeping our home is being met.
I'm disappointed because my need for partnership isn't being met in the way we're handling our finances.
I'm sad because my need for connection isn't being met when you're out with your friends every evening.
You can find out more about this style of intimate communication, along with other advice on building healthy, intimate relationships, at our website: www MagicRelationship dot com.
Another tip: when you offer your feelings and needs, it's best to follow them with a request. If you offer them without a request, your partner won't know why you're giving them the information.
Do you want to be just heard?
Do you want advice?
Do you want to come up with a strategy for meeting your needs? Why the heck are you telling me this?
Often, a comment without a request will be taken as blame... which will lead to fixing, fighting or fleeing. Don't leave your poor partner hanging.
Paul and I recommend asking, "Would you tell me what you heard me say?" (Avoid saying 'could'- it implies they aren't intelligent enough to repeat you. And avoid saying "What did I say?" because what you said and what they heard are two different things.)
And one more tip: don't think that little behaviors are enough to be warranted as 'sharing feelings and needs.' Fixing your honey a cup of coffee in the morning is very sweet, but it may not communicate your feelings of love and contentment like actually verbalizing the information. "I love you so much", PLUS the cup of coffee goes much further.
Frowning and throwing around the bed covers while you make the bed may not adequately communicate your feelings and needs, either.
Instead, say: "I'm feeling disappointed because my need for support around the house isn't being met. Would you be willing to discuss a way to help that would also meet your needs?"
There's no room for misinterpretation there.
Try it out this holiday season: make a pact with your beloved to share absolutely ALL your feelings and needs for one day - the good, the bad and the ugly. Then follow the information with a request.
Be prepared to spend some time processing and discussing those feelings and needs as they come up.
However, try to avoid getting into BLAMING and 'FAULT' behind the feelings and needs. That tends to end up in a free-for-all about evaluations and judgments - who's right and who's wrong. Try to stick with feelings, needs and requests.
Try to do this on a day when you'll have the time.
You won't want to get cut off because you have to run to pick up the kids right when you're getting to the heart of an issue that's snuck up silently between you.
You're going to want to stay and hold each other and talk it through... and feel the intimacy of clearing out all of those old, crusty feelings and unmet needs that have been clogging the flow of love.
And, again, you can find out more about this style of intimate communication for relationships, at our website - www MagicRelationship dot com - a along with advice on building healthy relationships.
Kristin Denton & Paul Sterling (authors) teach Relationship Communication Skills - Live Seminars or Tele-Classes including - 4 Steps To Instant Intimacy & Understanding - Relationship-Wrecking Mistakes -To get a free copy of 'The 5 Mistakes Report' go to http://www.magicRelationship.com/freeaccess Free Report
-MFA Corp@relationship
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